How To Plan A Hen Night - Before the Event
Some classic hen night advice & ideas to help your party succeed.
It's frightening to think how overwhelming hen night planning can look. Many of you who've been through the experience of putting one together might hoot with laughter when you hear a movie star or footballer talking about what "extreme pressure" they're under. These Robert De Niros and Jose Mourinhos should try juggling a combination of pre-wedding diet, budgetary constraints, transport, insurance and those potentially-explosive guest lists before they use such exaggerated terminology in future... Lightweights.
We present a mini-guide to planning the perfect hen night, from the size of party to the accommodation to the forfeits...
Did you know: Booking your hen night with LNOF saves you time and money!
With more than enough to occupy the bride's mind, she'll be relying on her friends to bring home the bacon and sort out the specifics relating to the hen weekend. Brownie points to those volunteering first!
There is no definitive guide on how to carry a hen weekend off with perfection, but there are a few rules of thumb that will stop you from making a Millennium Dome out of the whole thing.
Five Main Areas - The Key To Success
The main areas to tick off are: Who? Where? When? How to get there? and What to do?... everything else is just window dressing.
Who?
Assuming that the bride has selected her sub-committee of hen organisers, and that this power lobby includes you and a maximum of 2 other people, the chances are that she has given you a list of names that include the following brands of hen guests:-
Definites
This is the hard-core souls who the bride wants there no matter what the circumstances. You will probably be on this list and will not have to persuade the others to attend. But you will have to take heed of any dates they will not be available.
Possibles
This will include people who she hasn't seen for a little while and isn't sure of how likely they are to come, what with commitments, children and the like. The list will also include the "generally unreliables", i.e. those who the bride regards as 'characters' but who you may view as "pains in the arse".
Have-To's
This increasingly familiar pattern, also duplicated with stag nights these days, includes the prospective in-laws' relevant members being invited to proceedings, usually with the bride's secret hope that they can't actually come so that she can totally enjoy herself without being on her best behaviour but will still look a great daughter-in-law for having offered in the first place! Sometimes includes oddballs and space cadets who are long-time friends of someone on the 'definates' list, and thereby have to be invited.
Definitely Not's
Occasionally, the bride in question may have a couple of names who would one day have made the 'Have To's' list, but now, for reasons of violence, betrayal or suspected wrong-doing, are as welcome as gonorrhoea. When underlining these names, the determined but diplomatic bride will probably suggest picking a date or venue that this person will not be able to make, thereby again making it seem to the aforementioned undesirable that they had been invited when in fact they were never on the agenda. Be careful with this one though, it can backfire. You may earn your spurs from negotiating this part alone!
Where
The bride will doubtless have penciled down a shortlist of possible locations, though she probably won't care as long as it meets all her requirements. This is where your real work begins, for the venue has to be somewhere that will be easy enough for everyone to get to without it being somewhere they've all been plenty of times before; somewhere that is an exciting prospect, but not so far that the travel costs put people off; somewhere that is original and memorable but isn't going to be jam-packed with other hen parties doing exactly the same thing. A budget return fare by rocket to a health spa/pole dancing class on the moon might be ideal. Even then, someone will let you know that they "...will only go when the weather's not too cold..."
If you are planning for a UK-based weekend, we recommend sorting it out at least 3 months before; if the bride specifically wants to go out of the country (abroad) for her bash, we suggest doubling that. Last minute 'anywhere will do' jobs might be okay for the blokes, but we want what's best, don't we!
At this point, whilst deciding on where you want to base the fun and frolics, you will also need to know what approximate budget everyone is looking towards. It is no use going off and doing loads of research on a crammed itinerary in Newcastle if the cost per person doubles that of what most guests can afford. As the coordinator, you have to disprove the famous adage and keep all of the people happy absolutely all of the time.
When
This will be closely linked with your decision on where to go and depends on factors like train timetables, where the guests themselves live, what time each person can get to the hotel on the Friday, what time they each need to get back on the Sunday, etc. For a proper look at this variable, visit the Travel section of our advice pages, which also covers points on getting around once you're actually there.
What To Do
A massive part of the success of your weekend will be not so much where you are as what you do. Commonly, the bride will suggest one or two things that she's heard about or had recommended, but apart from that the itinerary will be in your hands. Naturally, you want a good standard of accommodation and a sit-down Meal while you're there, but you might be asked to sort out anything from a day's Pampering to some Karting too. As with the choice of dates, try to dissuade the bride from being too specific, just in case her original preference of Rally Karts, Medieval Banquet and Horse Riding hits an availability snag!
Try to imagine what cocktail of events will most suit and please the spread of guests likely to attend - would everyone really go for Quad Biking over a visit to a health spa? - and also consider that you need to hit the middle ground between not having enough to do and having too regimented a line-up. Easy? Yeah, right.
On a serious note, we would recommend that hen parties do not partake in Paintballing if you don't want bruises for the big day (this can also apply to Clay Pigeon Shooting if you're planning on wearing a short sleeved dress on the wedding day).
Finally, the weekend can always have a Theme too, should the lady of the hour so desire. Visit our section on this to see if you want to add this element to your list of tasks.
It's a big job for only the most seasoned plate-spinners - lucky for old Geldof that he won't ever have to plan even one hen weekend.
»» Ok now it is time to take it to the next step:
During Your Hen Night