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Cola bottles, like death and taxes, are one of the certainties of life. They will just always be there – whether it be at the shiny new multiplex cinema or sitting temptingly on the counter of your local post office. Of course, nothing quite beats the glory days of finding them nestled in the pic ‘n’ mix stand at Woolies (RIP). Until now.
Using our cutting edge science, we have managed to produce the next generation of cola flavoured confectionery: The Cola Willy. The new, revolutionary design offers a more engaging user experience than simply biting the top off a bottle, as the phallic shape delivers, not one, but three areas of interaction (you know which) for a completely new way to enjoy confection perfection.
We operate a no quibble returns policy. If you change your mind for whatever reason after purchasing an item from us, simply send it back and we will refund you, providing it is unused, in good condition and original packaging.
If you wish to return an item to us because it is faulty or has arrived damaged please contact us first, either by calling us on 0191 499 8760 or using our contact us form.
Last Night of Freedom, Statex House, Saltmeadows Road, Gateshead, NE8 3AH
Average Rating from 1 reviews
“I've been known to indulge in the odd cola bottle in my time - but though the experience was always 'pleasant', it was never even mildly erotic. Until now. I really liked this product a great amount. A terrific addition to this thing we call life. What a time to be alive.”