You’re a tanned, toned, hunk of a man – and you save lives. You see a woman in distress – you jump into the troubledwaters and effortlessly pull her out with one defined bicep curl (the other hand is busy carrying an inflatable red float - and seducinganother woman).
That’s because you’re Mitch Buchannon, AKA David Hasslehoff in his Baywatch prime (try to forget about that drunk burger video). He has awild, unmanicured and enviable chest-rug of hair and appears in Baywatch episodes with some of our favourite titles of all time: Face ofFear, Wet ‘n’ Wild, Air Buchannon and (the best by far) Beachblast.
This stag night theme has it covered in getting you the right sort of attention. It’s a little bit cheeky, yet self-deprecating, without dropping to thelevel of dressing up as a penis. You also get to slow-motion run to in your short-shorts. Our favourite accessory in this theme is the bumbag (or fanny pack as the Americans call it). An ideal item for storing your mobile, your wallet, and your keys - and for collecting ladies’ phone numbers. And for the ultimate stag humiliation - you've got to dress him up as a fat Pamela Anderson.
For a bonus Mitch Buchannon line: “Gail and I spent our honeymoon in Hawaii. Every time I see a volcano erupt, I think of her.” Amazing.