Things You Don't Hear in a

That's right, we've got another one. The quotes at LNOF HQ are coming in thick and fast, and they're starting to sound normal...

"Fancy dress? Don't know what you're talking about..."

  • "Do you think this would fit in someone's bra?"
  • One of our hip flasks - it depends on the bra, really
  • "It took me a while to get into the owl zone, but once I was there, everything fell into place"
  • Oooh, we have a real hoot here at LNOF
  • "Right. Headphones in. I need to switch off from everything and take myself into lesbian mode, I'll be back in the room in a few minutes"
  • We're very method when it comes to our content writing, even if we are writing about Benidorm's lesbian shows
  • "Is 'man wang' hyphenated?"
  • We decided that yes, it was
  • "We've had whips and cuffs since day one. Grow up"
  • And you think that's bad? Check out our gimp costume
  • "Dick-flops have landed today"
  • One small step for man, one giant leap for a... Dick Flop. (They're willy-shaped flip-flops for those not in the know. Which is most people.)
  • "I must have some more stiffy-related bantz" "I don't know. I think after a certain amount of time, my well of erection-based puns has run dry"
  • Well, quite
  • "What can we say about paragliding? Can we say pant-shittingly high?"
  • Probably not
  • "You've got to remember that you're not just browsing the internet - you're specifically looking for a fanny costume"
  • Head of E-Commerce, Will, getting into the mindset of our customers
  • "Hey, ladies... we've got some scented owls over here... "
  • Will knows what ladies like
  • "For this insurance policy, I need to state whether we sell any protective items. Do you reckon I need to include our rubber johnnies?"
  • Probably not - we don't think small pecker condoms count as birth control. That's also probably not what the insurance company meant
  • "We get some really classy hens coming to us" "Do you think they'll want to get involved with anything that has a 'beasting station'?"
  • We would imagine so
  • "I'm really sick of tits. I'm even bored of my own"
  • Our wide range of steak and tits packages were taking their toll that day
  • "There's no import taxation precedent for penis-shaped flip-flops"
  • Well, there isn't

Last Updated - 14/08/2023

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