The Ultimate Newcastle Stag Do Guide 2023

If you fancy getting balls deep in Newcastle, you’re in luck. Howlers is paradise for big kids. In a nutshell, it is a giant soft play with the option of bottomless booze. The subterranean Diamond Strip spot is most famous for the big ball pit, but the cocktails are also flippin’ fabulous and we would know, having had a cracking staff night out there.It has everything from drag shows and pizza to bingo and lip sync battles. Beats a quiet night in Spoons, eh?Plus you’ll struggle to find anywhere better in the city to snap your perfect stag selfie than the giant Barbie box.

This firm-favourite amongst Geordie Shore, and locals alike, is what you’d call classy. It’s all exposed brick, leather booths, chandeliers and mood lighting. However, Bohemia's Alfresco Bar, Newcastle’s largest outdoor space - boasting a capacity for 350 – is where you’ll spend most of the time. You can even access the Bigg Market’s, Blackie Boy, through here; two bars rolled into one magnificent package.

Step inside the biggest ‘superclub’ to open on Tyneside for well over a decade.With a state-of-the-art sound system, and space for 1,500 clubbers, The Loft is the newest jewel in Newcastle’s nightlife crown. Spread across three cool and vibrant rooms, clubbers can enjoy the biggest tunes every weekend at what used to be Tiger Tiger. The owners have links to some of the biggest nightclubs in the world – including Ibiza’s legendary Café Mambo – while it has hosted superstars including Pete Tong since opening in August 2021. And if you fancy filling up before hitting the dancefloor, start your night downstairs at sister venue The Hustle.New York-style Tapas (Yup, it is a thing and yup, it is unbelievable) and cocktails are on the menu here, as the DJs whip you into a disco fever. They even run a cocktail masterclass. Sip, sip hooray!

It might sound like the sort of place you stumble into at 3am after a skinful in Berlin, but the Wonderbar specialises in something distinctly British. Darts. You know, Arrows. Double top. Innnnn one. Jim Bowen.Inside Newcastle’s only interactive darts venue, there are a raft of different games to help you channel your inner Phil Taylor And even if you don’t know your ochie from your bull, then this Gate-based boozer has you covered.Tons of TVs to watch the footy, pizza and a rotating range of beers (and they tend to be crackers) for the perfect day out with the lads.

Guten Tag! Welcome to the most Bavarian boozer west of Munich. Don your finest lederhosen and raise a glass to the land of Audi, Beethoven, and Uwe Rösler and reserve a spot for a night of German mayhem. The Stien Bierkeller Newcastle is an absolute belter of a bar, mainly because it doesn’t tinker with a winning recipe. Want banging music and table dancing? Check. Do you want a proper Bigg Market experience? Check? And I’m assuming, given you are looking to book a stag do, you want strong beer served in what can be best described as a vat? Check. It is so good, you’ll not want to say auf wiedersehen – just, whatever you do, don’t mention the war.

If you had to boil a Geordie night out down into one bar, this could very well be it.One of Tyneside’s greatest guilty pleasures, Mushroom’s staff have been fuelling hangovers for the best part of 20 years. Their weapon of choice? Trebles. Strong, strong trebles that will knock your shoes off.And you’d have noticed that once upon a time, as the venue used to have some of the stickiest floors in the Northern Hemisphere (Although hardly surprising given the number of vodka and Red Bulls they’d flog).However the venue has recently had recently been spruced up and looks the bee’s knees – although how much attention you’ll be paying to the décor after your fifth Skittles remains to be seen.

One word: vodka. The original home of the spirit that sends you home early is at the very start of Newcastle’s Diamond Strip (of MTV’s Geordie Shore fame). Set in a former bank, with original marble pillars and columns, it’s one of those bars you begin the night’s good intentions with (before ending it in a takeaway on the Bigg Market). But, back to the vodka – they range in flavours from Birthday Cake, to Das Bomb and XXX Chilli. Get yourself a Revs card and you’ll get special offers aplenty, including 2-4-1 lethal cocktails and awesome deals on pints, pitchers and shots. You can even get tasty food here. Good luck leaving here sober...

Tyneside’s biggest strip club - and the perfect spot for some saucy stag action. For Your Eyes Only strip club is an underground paradise is packed with some of the most stunning Geordie lasses you’ll ever meet. And if the dancers get boring (impossible, by the way), there are several ultra HD TVs to feast your eyes on instead. FYEO also doesn’t shut until well past 4am at the weekend, although it is just as jumping before kick-off, offering some of the cheapest drinks deals and some of the biggest, well, you know what.

Fancy a bottle of dog without finding yourself at the centre of an RSPCA probe? Then visit this uber-chic Dean Street watering hole that loves the stuff – or, as it is known outside of the city walls, Newcastle Brown Ale. And if that doesn’t tickle your fancy, it has cracking vintage cocktails, tipsy tea and banging beats – with a soundtrack infused with the best in house, funk and soul

The opposite of a quiet, cosy night in the house – Flares is tacky, in your face and all the better for it.The bar that puts the F in Fun, expect neon colours, cheesy pop and truckloads of alcopops that you won’t have sipped since the late 90s. There’s absolutely nothing subtle about this legendary Tyneside party bars. Big, bold and brash is the name of the game - this is what a proper Geordie night out is all about. Just remember to leave your boring mates back at the hotel.

Picking a pub as a cultural hotspot may seem like the most Geordie thing ever, but The Strawberry is something a bit special. Nestled in the shadow of St James’ Park, the iconic boozer is a Tyneside landmark. The rooftop beer garden is one of the best places to sip a pint as the sun sets, and also perfect for a refreshing bevvie after your NUFC Rooftop Tour.

And that brings us on nicely to The Strawberry’s next door neighbour. The lifeblood of a city that lives and breathes football, St James’ Park is one of the Premier League’s biggest grounds and capable of hosting over 52,000 screaming Geordies every week. LNOF’s been lucky enough to follow the likes of Alan Shearer and grace the hallowed turf and, while our staff are unlikely to be appearing on Match of the Day anytime soon, you could take a take a private tour for a peak inside the Magpies nest.

And if beer is what you are after, welcome to paradise. Located in the city centre’s magnificent Exhibition Park, it resides in the lakeside Palace of Arts, which was opened almost a century ago by the then Prince of Wales. Now if it houses one of the North East’s best craft breweries while the spacious venue also stages everything from weddings to gigs (and also a cracking spot for a chilled-out Sunday roast before your train).

And when that train departs Central Station, this will likely be the last thing you see in Newcastle. But what a legacy to leave on. Geordies are rightfully proud of their bridges – there are seven across the River Tyne – and this is arguably the most magnificent of them all. Opened in 1928 by King George V, the 389m long design was based on the Sydney Harbour Bridge – but we think it is better, especially while sipping a drink in the shadow of it on The Quayside. Thankfully, we offer plenty of hotels that are a mere stone’s throw away if you too wish to bask in its green glory.

From Music to Hollywood, Newcastle has knocked out a fair few celebs over the years. From Cheryl Cole and Sting to Sir Bobby Robson and Gazza, many of the biggest stars were born and bred on Tyneside. And if you fancy walking off that bottomless brunch with a walk along The Quayside, this is a great chance to spot some of the bronze plaques bestowed on our most famous sons and daughters (obviously Ant and Dec are in there).

Almost 900 years old and with a grisly, blood-soaked history, the castle was once Newcastle’s last line of defence during the English Civil War, while prisoners chains still remain it the dungeon. The closest you’ll get to a working dungeon in Newcastle these days is by hiring a dominatirx on your stag do. But if you prefer to be a history buff than in the buff, the Castle’s remarkable past (someone once launched a donkey off the roof) will keep you entertained for hours.

Named after the 2nd Early Grey, hopefully it will be your cup of tea. Geordie’s adore the Grade I listed design, with the 135ft monument always a popular central spot to meet your mates (especially as it has a Metro station directly beneath). And you might get lucky – officials very occasionally let the public climb the 164 step spiral staircase. It provides one of the most special panoramic views of the city – but be warned, it is a tight squeeze.

At almost 4km long and buried up to 85ft below the city, the tunnel runs through much of central Newcastle – including the Central Motorway and Northumbria University. Work commenced on the tunnel in 1839, with the aim of using it as a wagonway to transport coal through the city before it was eventually abandoned. It later found use as a World War Two air-raid shelter. Now, it is a tourist attraction – and a very cool one at that

Located in the western part of the city and marked by lanterns, statues and a huge Chinese arch, China Town is one of only five China Towns in England, and a great place to grab some traditional Chinese food before heading out. Nestled mostly along Stowell Street and close to St James Park, the cultural hub of China Town attracts thousands every week. Apart from restaurants, it also houses Spot White American Pool Lounge and is just a stone's throw from The Gate complex with its cinemas and bars.

Viewed by around 33m people each year (largely due to the fact it looms over the A1), architect Anthony Gormley’s steel sculpture split opinion like nothing else when it was unveiled in 1998. Now it is a Tyneside treasure, and worthy of a pilgrimage – especially as you could have a kickabout on the footy pitch directly next to it.