The Ultimate Newcastle Stag Do Guide 2018

This raucous, underground bar is like nothing you’ve ever seen before - you don’t get much louder or more German than a night in Bierkeller. This chain is sweeping the nation, serving massive steins of beers to stag groups in lederhosen. With those biers in mind – you’ve got nine on draught to sample, as well as pretzels and frankfurters to soak up that Bavarian booze. This underground bar also has frauleins in bier maid outfits and a live Oompah band that gets everyone bonding – ready to end the night thigh slapping or stomping, up on the benches and tables.

Filthy’s, directly opposite Bier Keller, is the archetypal bar of the Bigg Market. The Irish-inspired venue is basically built for stags, with actual stag heads on the wall, fake grass in the smoking area, quirky couches to fall into and live bands and singers on stage every weekend. Basically, it gets louder the later it gets, with pints flying about regularly… it’s our favourite bar – and you’ve got ‘til 3am to enjoy it, ya filthy animals.

The Quayside, so named after its location (would you believe…), is hands down the best ‘Spoons in Newcastle. The pub boasts two beer gardens, one directly overlooking the Tyne, and another surrounded by other bars and clubs. It’s also a complete suntrap. We don’t even have to go into much detail on the drink and food offers you’ll get here. Basically, the likes of two pitchers for £10 and cheap pints are calling your name. You’ve also got the classic grub; we all know and love the beer and a burger at just £5. Your hangover begins, and ends, here.

One word: vodka. The original home of the spirit that sends you home early is at the very start of Newcastle’s Diamond Strip (of MTV’s Geordie Shore fame). Set in a former bank, with original marble pillars and columns, it’s one of those bars you begin the night’s good intentions with (before ending it in a takeaway on the Bigg Market). But, back to the vodka – they range in flavours from Birthday Cake, to Das Bomb and XXX Chilli. Get yourself a Revs card and you’ll get special offers aplenty, including 2-4-1 lethal cocktails and awesome deals on pints, pitchers and shots. You can even get tasty food here. Good luck leaving here sober...

Tiger Tiger is an animal in the Bigg Market, right at the top in the lively Gate entertainment complex. They don’t come much bigger than this club, with an epic seven rooms to get lost in with the Geordies. The Groovy Wonderland is a hen group haven (heads up, lads), playing 90s and 00s, as is the tropical paradise, Kanaloa. Jewel Bar is on the ground floor, sitting pretty in its luxurious surroundings, Raffles is packed full of booze and the White Room is based on the ‘White Island’ of Ibiza. You can also impress those lasses with your pipes (wait for it) in the Lucky Voice karaoke room…

Madame Koo by name, and Madame by nature. Perched right in the middle of the nightclub-heavy street, she’s known as the ‘unofficial’ Queen of the Diamond Strip. The entrance is just as sleek as the underground bar, with an iconic statue looking over the huge crowds each weekend. The bar is all deep red and mysterious, with hidden dance floor and a wonderful and weird world of fancy dress, whilst serving up a Geordie legend – the Zombie. The recipe is top secret, but you’ll only need one. To put it in perspective, it’s offered in several other bars and they will only serve one per person… You’ve only got to head up Madame Koo’s spiral staircase (navigate carefully, especially when those zombies kick in) to walk into the tropical wonderland of Florita's nightclub – with its cool crowd, resident bongo players and extra potent drinks. It’s two for one with this place, really.

It goes without saying, you can’t have a Newcastle stag do without getting yourselves to the strippers. For Your Eyes Only strip club is Newcastle’s premium lap dancing club, with lavish interiors and stunning girls to match. Located on Grainger Street, close to The Diamond Strip and Central Station, you’ll stroll down the stairs into the decadent stag do heaven and be met by scores of beautiful dancers on the stage, who are ready and waiting to give you a private dance, and make your stag do one to remember.

You’ll be familiar with this bar if you watch (you guessed it) Geordie Shore. Officially recognised as the ‘busiest little bar in Newcastle’, Bijoux has a huge band of followers in the city. It’s set at the top of the Diamond Strip, boasting the best drinks on the street. By that, we mean three trebles for £6… can’t argue with that. On average, this bar attracts over 6,000 punters each weekend, has a stellar, international DJ portfolio and a sister bar in Marbella. You’re in Geordie Shore-land now.

This firm-favourite amongst Geordie Shore, and locals alike, is what you’d call classy. It’s all exposed brick, leather booths, chandeliers and mood lighting. However, Perdu’s Alfresco Bar, Newcastle’s largest outdoor space - boasting a capacity for 350 – is where you’ll spend most of the time. You can even access the Bigg Market’s, Blackie Boy, through here; two bars rolled into one magnificent package. Don’t mind if we Perdu…

If you’re a group of fungis (get it?) who don’t take themselves too seriously, there’s a space on The Mushroom’s dancefloor with your name on it. Located in the rowdy Bigg Market, The Mushroom’s cheesy tunes and seriously cheap drink make it the best place to get tanked up for a massive one in Newcastle. You can take the weight off your feet in one of the plush booths, or pull out your best moves on the dancefloor (leave your inhibitions at the door). There’s one bar which is as long as the entire bar, with lots of staff serving all night, so you won’t be waiting long for your next drink.

Just opposite NUFC’s home ground of St James’ Park, The Strawberry is a long-standing traditional pub, jam-packed with Newcastle United memorabilia. On match days, whether you’re out on the rooftop terrace or in the bar area itself, you can’t get moved in here. With discounted deals on drinks all year round, it’s a great place to tick off a ‘cultural hotspot’, get merry and get one of your five a day whilst you’re at it.

Founded in 2000, Wylam is a former 1920s exhibition centre, now home to a 30 barrel micro-brewery located in Newcastle’s Exhibition Park. Steeped in history, this iconic Newcastle landmark is a fantastic venue for everything from tasting the latest craft ales to getting yourselves in the front row of a live music concerts.

The current home ground of the all hailed Magpies has been used as a site for football since 1880, and has been home to Newcastle United Football Club since 1892. This whopping landmark reaches 91 metres up above Newcastle skyline, and with a seating capacity of 52,405, is magnificent in itself. If you’ve got a head for heights (and aren’t too hungover), you can even take a rooftop tour, for a spectacular view over Newcastle. Or, you could just get yourselves tickets to a match and see the Magpies play on their home turf.

Probably Newcastle’s most well-known landmark is the 389 metre long Tyne Bridge, based on the Sydney Harbour Bridge. Officially opened in 1928 by King George V, the bottle green bridge has seen millions of vehicles pass over it, from Gateshead into Newcastle and back - and can be spotted from any bar along The Quayside. It’s also the most iconic part of the Great North Run half marathon stretch.

Similar to the Hollywood Walk of Fame, the banks of the River Tyne are lined with bronze plaques dedicated to the city’s local heroes, past and present. The every growing list has the likes of Sir Bobby Robson CBE, Sting, Ant and Dec, Brendan Foster CBE and Dame Margaret Barbour. If you’re having a few drinks along The Quayside, why not see who you can spot?

Steeped in centuries of history, Newcastle’s castle is a Grade I listed building, right within the heart of the city centre. The impressive Castle Keep and the Black Gate make up what remains of the castle, and occupy the site where the city (of stag do dreams) was born. It’s also adjacent to St Nicholas Cathedral, so you can tick off two cultural spots in one. Ideal.

Named after the 2nd Earl Grey, who was the British Prime Minister in the 1830s and famously had the delicious blend of tea named after him, Newcastle’s Monument is now a central meeting point in the city. You can even climb the 164 steps up the spiral staircase to the top, for an unrivalled panoramic view of The Toon.

Built in 1842 to transport coat from the colliery to the riverside, The Victoria Tunnel runs beneath the city, from the spacious Town Moor, all the way to the Tyne. It was also converted into an air raid shelter during World War II. You can even take a tour if you’re bold enough.

Located in the western part of the city and marked by lanterns, statues and a huge Chinese arch, China Town is one of only five China Towns in England, and a great place to grab some traditional Chinese food before heading out. Nestled mostly along Stowell Street and close to St James Park, the cultural hub of China Town attracts thousands every week. Apart from restaurants, it also houses Spot White American Pool Lounge and is just a stone's throw from The Gate complex with its cinemas and bars.

Our guardian angel (she’s loved in The Toon) stands over us tall at 20 metres, with a whopping wing span of 54 metres. You’ll drive past her on the way in (and stop for a selfie, obviously), or you’ll see her from a distance if you arrive by train – she’s a sight to behold. And, if you have enough energy after a night on the Toon tiles – there’s a footy pitch next to her where you can showcase your skills.