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We moustache you a question, but we’ll shave it for later. For now, check out our fine selection of facial hair.
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You normally keep a stiff upper lip when it comes to disappointment, but even you shed a tear when moustache growing attempt #23 was a failure. No need to worry – your dreams of a fantastic tache are not long behind you. We have a range of fake moustaches on offer so that you can instantly get that sexy Tom Selleck look. Our Large Moustache is about as good as handlebars can get – and is a great non-adhesive option due to its elasticated strap. But for the more realistic, hairy look we have the Thick Black Moustache, an absolute masterpiece of facial hair with an adhesive back, so you can be secure with your new style. And for the man that can never have enough options, the Comedy Moustache Selection has enough taches for every day in the week.
These novelty fake beards will mark the end of baby faces and patchy whiskers. Step into your true bearded identity with our range of extremely masculine chin warmers. You might be hit with the sudden urge to chop wood and build a cabin in the woods with our Black and Ginger Hipster Beards. And with our Long Beard, you’ll achieve facial hair lengths that are as of yet un-gnome to man (yes, they go great with our Gnome Costumes, if you were wondering).
And finally, no man with extreme facial hair capabilities would be seen dead without some killer sideburns. Our Stylish Sideburn Collection has three gloriously fuzzy styles for you to choose from – because as we all know, you shouldn’t limit yourself to just one bit on the side. Team up with our Thick Black Moustache for that iconic 70s pornstar look that no woman (over 50) will be able to resist.
Best Budget: Thick Black Moustache
This is a 70s pornstar tache that won’t break the bank. At just 99p this lady tickler could be all yours.>
70s Retro Style
Thick and Hairy
Mates Might Not Recognise You
Its adhesive backing means it won’t be falling off at any awkward moments… no matter what you’re getting up to.
Best Value: International Moustache Selection
Why be limited to one tache identity? Have the facial hair of the world at your fingertips with our selection of International Moustaches.>
6 Different Nationalities
Seem More Cultured Than You Are
Please Don’t Do the Accents
French? Chinese? Kazak? We’ve got all the most iconic moustaches for you to woo the women of the world with.
Biggest Sex Appeal: Ginger Hipster Beard
We call this the ‘hipster beard’ but it could just as well be sexy Viking or hunky lumberjack beard. Whatever you decide it is, one thing is for sure – this beard has got sex appeal written all over it.>
Women Will Want to Sleep With You
Obscure Band Knowledge Not Included
We aren’t 100% sure what it is about a wild bushy beard but God knows it’s working for the Jason Momoas of the world, so why not you too?
1. Comedy Moustache Selection
2. Ginger Hipster Beard
3. Black Hipster Beard
4. Thick Black Moustache
5. International Moustache Selection
6. Stylish Sideburn Collection
Based on sales data lastnightoffreedom.co.uk 2019
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