A Letter from Head Honcho

We’re a busy lot at LNOF HQ. We don’t just spend all our time writing about plastic willies and doing beer bongs, you know. Here are just a few of the things we’ve been up to this last month…

Autumn Fair

Will and I had our annual trip down to the Autumn Fair in Birmingham, continuing our quest to find the next big thing in stag and hen accessories. Our trips have changed over the years – whereas we used to return with hundreds of new products, we’re now the biggest stag and hen accessories supplier in the UK and so it has to be something really special for us to take it on. This year we found an exciting new supplier of hen party accessories. We’re keeping it top secret for now (because we’re terribly exclusive) but they’re upmarket, classy and sophisticated and the LNOF lasses in the office have been lusting over them already.

We also found some amazing T-shirt printing machines. Our current method of customising T-shirts requires the skill, nimbleness and attention to detail of a Bond Street tailor, but these machines are capable beasts that you just run the material through like a giant printer. The downside is that they cost roughly the same as a new car...

Plastic Willies, Pints and Room Service

LNOF Sales Team Hit Dublin

Some of the LNOF sales team hit Dublin last weekend to meet some of our current and exciting new suppliers and to get to know the city like the back oftheir hands. This quest, I’m informed, involved drinking a lot of Guinness – to ensure it was an authentically Irish experience. The Operations crew, Cheryl and Sean, went early on Friday morning andspent some time with one of our top hotel suppliers. They were introduced to the hotel’s swanky new restaurant, piano barand newly extended beer garden before the rest of the sales team – Adam, Paul, Jamesand Katie - rocked up at 12:30am to hit the Dublin clubs. This resulted in a 5am finish – which would have been all well and good (hey, I’mnot their Dad) if they didn’t have a load of extreme adventure sports booked in for 9am…

But there's nothing like some Ariel Trekking to kick you out of a hangover! Ariel Trekking is essentially a high-up roped obstacle course in the sky, which rendered Sean too terrified to even try it and left Katie clinging to a wooden polerefusing to move. However, it sounds far less terrifying than The Fan Descender. For those of you not in the know (like I wasn’t), you getharnessed up and basically step off the equivalent of a three-story building, where you put all your trust in a controlled wire system slowing as youapproach the ground. Cormac, the instructor, described it as ‘the closest you can get to feeling like you’re free-falling without jumping out of a plane’. Needless to say, everybody got involved.Except Sean.

Shooting and Champagne

Miss Newcastle GB 2014

You know, one of the toughest parts of supporting north-east talent is having to go to events packed with beautiful women - but hey, someone's got to do it... Thanks to our lovely chums at Headline Models (who recently modelled a million silly, outrageous and downright rude costumes and accessories for us), we were able to sponsor the prestigious Miss Newcastle GB 2014 Final.

The night was held at the ultra-posh Assembly Rooms in Newcastle city centre in the even posher Chandelier Suite. It was a cocktail dress, tuxedo, champagne and three-course meal affair – a royal knees up with a masquerade theme. We sponsored the stunning Kate Graham and are very proud to say she came 2nd place! We think you’ll agree that she’s bloody gorgeous (especially rocking that Last Night of Freedom sash).

Masquerade Ball in the Chandelier Suite

About the Author

Matt is a keen rugby player, no doubt partly due to his Australian birth, and a mean table football adversary. Like the shark in his favourite movie "Jaws", Mavir is a rare species in the world - someone who attempts to put reputation before earning a fast buck. Unlike the infamous predator, he is not mechanically operated and has never bitten anyone's head off. Mind you, he was rather firm with someone caught trying to pinch his parking spot at Tesco's last week! Matt likes to unwind by curling up in a good carpet every now and again, and, as point of principle, never pays less than £50 for a cab ride home. Stunningly handsome.

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